Miss Chaos

  • 24 yrs old
  • I'm a new mother to a 6 month old boy
  • I like to rant
  • I like conspiracy theories and parapsychology
  • I'm addicted to World of warcraft
  • I work at a women's shelter as a Family life Consoler
  • I like midnight runs around the neighborhood
  • I spend most of my free time with my family
  • My favorite colrs are yellow green and pink
  • I'm a Libra
  • I eat when I'm bored
  • I collect classic literature
  • I hate hilary clinton, liars and christians


    E-mail >> me

    IM:
    Yahoo: zero_doll999

    Playlist at the moment.

    Mood.

    unstimulated

    expressions




    places to go

    Justin
    MySpace
    Penny arcade comics

    Archives.

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  • Saturday, September 27, 2008

    Dream on

    My whole teenage existence and on up (after my mother passed away) I've always had the same dream about her..
    The dream usually was pretty simple: She wasn't dead and never died and the tone of the dream went either two ways: I was happy that she was alive or sometimes VERY angry that she lied to me. Obviously whatever emotion I was feeling took the dream to a different level.
    My self diagnosis is simple, repressed emotion toward my mothers death.

    But last night it went to a whole new level! I had the dream of her being alive, But my family was involved. I also screamed at her, asked her how could she have lied to me and left me to raise myself, my brother and take care of my father. I was going into detail about John and how alone and broken down I felt. My brothers and sisters were trying to protect her, but I kept yelling and throwing things.
    My unconscious mind was very upset last night, apparently. There's a definite amount of resentment in the dream, a little PTSD, and the outburst is more signs of repressed emotions.

    Man, it was just crazy..I woke up in a sweat andm y heart racing. It's NEVER been that intense or depressing.